Naked advice chat room
Be honest, ASSHOLE, just this once: Is the destruction of your wife a bug or is it a feature? Because cheating on this scale isn't about succumbing to temptation or reacting to neglect.It's about the annihilation of your partner—a (hopefully) subconscious desire to punish and destroy someone, anyone, fool enough to love you.Which means it's both ultimatum and bluff-calling time.So long as your husband thinks he can dictate terms by pointing to his triggers and his trauma, GMHC, he has every incentive to continue being triggered and traumatized.I agreed to a monogamous relationship, and I've gone a year without hooking up with anyone else.
There are women out there who aren't interested in monogamy, there are female cuckolds out there (cuckqueans) who want cheating husbands, and there are masochistic women (and men) out there who get off on the thought of being with a person who would like to crush them. We met in college and, except for a six-month break, we've been together ever since.
You're a handsome couple—thanks for enclosing the lovely picture (sometimes it's nice to see the face of the person I'm responding to!
)—with a long history together, and here's hoping things work out.
But almost immediately, he began talking about how he wanted to hook up with others. I feel tremendous guilt for even thinking about splitting up, so I keep hoping we'll stumble on the thing that will work for us.
I don't know what to say when he says I should be monogamous to him while he gets to hook up with others. Gay Marriage Having Crisis I've written about a few gay couples—and a few straight ones—where one half gets to hook up with others while the other half doesn't.